I wasn’t a religious boy from my childhood itself neither did my parents did/do regularly worshipping of God. They worshiped god occasionally and the same trait got passed on to me. For a very long time in my life, I would suddenly become a religious person whenever I was frightened or I needed something. I would beg God that if you do this I will do it and so hence and so forth.
I remember before I saw my class 10th result I begged God that please get me 80%+ marks and I would study very hard in class 11th and 12th. I got 81% marks and I didn’t study hard in my intermediate exams which resulted in me getting 72% marks.
Always after my need was over I would become an atheist. However, this doesn’t mean that I stopped going to temples or hate God or something like that. I ignored God but leaving him completely was difficult because I was frightened that If I left God he could do anything, I would attach anything bad happening in my life with me not worshipping God.
I still remember myself begging God whenever I visited a temple. I remember when I went to ISKON temple, Patna I was shouting the name of Ram & Krishna like hell. I guess if I go to the temple now I will do the same thing.
Slowly and gradually I became attracted towards becoming an atheist, I don’t know because there is no single possible reason for it. I even remember lastly when I went to a temple I said to God that I was not there to ask something. I just want to ask about your well-being and it was very abnormal for me as I used to beg and see my parents beg in front of God for 17 years + now.
It might seem a bit controversial but still, I will share what I think. I keep myself not equal but above God. For me I am God. I believe that there is no God and if he exists then I am bigger, better, kinder and mightier than Him. My thoughts could change or evolve but this is what I think now. Also, I won’t force anyone to think like I do.
I am an Hindu Atheist or an atheist and any success or failure I get in future, I will be fully responsible for it.
Also, I like some of the ideologies of Swami Vivekanand and Dhruv Rathee so, I guess I am a bit inspired by them.
This is Navneet signing off from today’s blog.
Peace 🕊️